Those raised by a parent that is an alcoholic can take this pain into their adult life, manifesting itself through their own addictions and mental health disorders. This condition is coined Adult Children of Alcoholics, or ACOA. As children, these individuals likely had to develop early coping skills to manage life with an alcoholic parent or caregiver. While at the time these coping mechanisms enabled the child to stay safe in an otherwise unstable environment, as an adult these same coping skills can cause relationship problems and mental health concerns.
How Does a Parent’s Alcoholism Affect Adult Children
Parents and caregivers are an important part of a child’s upbringing, helping them to form patterns and characteristics that will ultimately shape their personality. When a parent is an alcoholic there becomes some level of disfunction in the family relationship. Some of the most common lasting effects for adult children of alcoholics include a constant struggle to maintain interpersonal relationships. Without having a healthy environment growing up, ACOA often have little understanding of what a healthy relationship should look like. In adulthood, children of alcoholics are often impulsive and may participate in dangerous behaviors. Anxiety and hypervigilance, while an important coping skill for children with an alcoholic parent, can lead to an adult that is unable to relax and let down their guard. In extreme cases this can result in panic attacks, extreme phobias, and paranoia.
Adult children of alcoholics often struggle with fears of abandonment, a common feeling as a child growing up in a contentious environment. Fear of conflict and conflict avoidance are another common trait in ACOA. As children, these individuals often learned to not upset their alcoholic parent walking on eggshells to keep the peace. This pattern can continue as an adult, resulting in self-esteem problems and struggles with resentment in their relationships. These personality characteristics, often learned as children, can cause problems as adults.
Recovering from the Trauma of Being an Adult Child of an Alcoholic
It is possible to overcome these challenges and begin the healing process as an adult child of an alcoholic. By addressing the trauma that this caused as a child, those affected can begin to heal and recognize patterns in their behavior that are the result of this upbringing. Seeking professional therapy, can help you to have a healthy self-image and maintain relationships that are a positive thing in your life.
Many adult children of alcoholics are not even aware of how this childhood trauma has impacted their behavior as adults. When this is brought to light through therapy, you can begin to see how the coping skills developed during the formative years to survive may actually be damaging your mental health as an adult.
At Campbell Recovery Services we work with adult children of alcoholics to begin healing from the trauma left by a parent’s addiction. Through therapy and counseling, you can begin the healing process and learn to recognize these damaging traits that may be affecting your sense of self and all your relationships.
